Will Google clone you for its cyborg army?
Hey, everyone, I�m Molly Wood and welcome to the Buzz Report,
the show about the tech news that everyone is talking about.
This week, Google REALLY knows who you are, the iPhone 4S
is like an app that prints money, and the bestest Xbox ever,
coming soon?
But first, it�s the Gadget of the Week.
The Gadget of the Week is the Droid Razr MAXX, arriving in
Verizon stores this week.
The Razr Maxx is pretty much the
same as the old Droid Razr -- by OLD, I mean, the one that
came out like three months ago.
But the Razr Maxx has a bigger
battery.
But not ACTUALLY bigger.
It�s a new battery that lasts
way longer, but the phone is still almost exactly the same as the
one you already paid 300 bucks for three months ago!
But
seriously, you didn�t want all-day battery and 21 hours of talk
time with your other Razr anyway, that�s just like a special thing
that only some people want.
No, no.
Everyone wants that.
Man,
this phone kinda pisses me off.
The battery thing is cool, though,
it is.
Really.
Maybe all phones could have that someday.
Anyway, now for the news
Google introduced new privacy changes this week that unify all
the company�s various services.
So, Google can now share
information about you across all its sites and services--like,
Gmail ads will know about your YouTube videos, Picasa ads will
know about your searches, maybe ads in your phone�s Google
Maps app could be based on your recent check-ins on Google
Plus.
The policy will NOT include information from Google
Chrome, Books, or Wallet.
HOWEVER, you cannot opt out of
these changes.
You�re sharing across every Google site now,
period.
So, you know.
Internet freakout.
I admit, my first thought was, what�s the big deal?
This sounds
like the kind of unified, integrated business strategy Google has
needed for YEARS.
What a good idea!
But they�re such robots,
they got all nerd-gasmy about all the cool stuff they COULD do if
they know everything about you, and they put it in a BLOG
POST, and then everyone freaked right the hell out including
members of Congress.
Listen.
Google?
I know you�re planning to
make a digital cyborg copy of me in your secret headquarters,
any day now.
Fine.
It�s actually only about half as skeevy as
everything Facebook is doing.
But just maybe TRY keeping it on
the down-low, PR-wise, and just TELL me it�s for streamlining
and efficiency?
And then stop talking?
Also, don�t let my cyborg
copy kill me.
That wouldn�t be cool.
Interestingly, Google actually missed its quarterly earnings
expectations this week for the first time in who knows how long.
Not so with Apple, however, HOLY HANNAH.
They printed
money this quarter -- 46 billion dollars in revenue and 13 billion
dollars in PURE PROFIT.
All thanks to iPhone 4S.
The revenue
even blew away Apple�s expectations--actually, they even sold a
record high number of Macs this quarter at 5.2 million.
That
explains why my Facebook feed is suddenly full of people
asking, �who here bought Apple at a hundred bucks?
Wanna buy
me a yacht?� I didn�t, in case you�re wondering.
Stupid ethics.
Moving on.
If weird things were happening with your gadgets,
your TV, the power in your building, stuff like that?
Don�t worry.
It�s just death from above.
The biggest solar storm in eight years pummeled earth this
week, causing aurora borealis across Canada, Britain, and even
as far south as Oregon.
The storm was said to be even stronger
than originally predicted and flights near both poles had to be re-
routed for two days as a result of satellite and radio interference.
Also, my ATM card wouldn�t work yesterday, and I am
CONVINCED that�s why.
I�m just saying.
Some quick headlines from the tech news this past week:
New rumors suggest a new Xbox coming in fall 2013 -- the Xbox
720 will reportedly be six times more powerful than the current
Xbox and 20 percent more powerful than the upcoming Wii U.
Sadly the manners of all those foul-mouthed, misogynist,
homophobic juveniles on Xbox Live will be zero percent
improved.
At long last, the co-CEOs of Research in Motion stepped down
this past weekend.
The news went public right in the middle of
the EXTREMELY close playoff game between the New York
Giants and the San Francisco 49ers--ensuring most of the media
was otherwise occupied.
And yeah.
At this point, I cared almost
exactly enough to retweet it about half an hour later.
Good luck,
new guy!
Anonymous says it�s targeting Facebook again -- the loose
consortium of the planet�s hackers said Facebook is going down
on January 28th.
My sources tell me that�s unlikely--mainly
because even though Anonymous managed to take out the CIA,
Justice Department, and FBI Websites with the OpMegaUpload
hack this week?
Facebook is a whole different ballgame.
I mean,
Facebook is BIG.
And that�s the Buzz Report for this week, everyone.
I�m Molly
Wood and thank you for watching.
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