Mark Zuckerberg has just wrapped another leg of his global Facebook 2018 apology tour or as I'm calling Apolapalooza.
It had all the hallmarks of a great gig, fancy European hipsters, expensive bottled water, and just like Burning Man, a bunch of people sitting Sitting in a circle, watching a guy who's actively on fire.
But among the talk of connecting the world, Marky Mark and the Zucky bunch have a big problem.
They need to crack down on all the fake news and garbage being posted to Facebook by Russian trolls and extremists.
And they wanna do it with artificial intelligence!
But wait a minute, isn't fixing Facebook with A.I. a terrible idea?
Humans have made machines so complex that they can think for themselves.
But we're gonna make them wade through the hot chunks that we spew onto our Facebook feeds everyday.
Your cousin ranting about Illuminati chemtrails.
You friend's endless post about a shock eyed baby.
And your Aunt, who's somehow confuses status updates with the Google search bar.
[UNKNOWN] I will have to answer some tough questions.
Is Hitlers chihuahua more offensive that Stalin cat?
Is a cartoon of a chu chu train still sexist if the train is holding a college diploma?
And just how much of the thigh does your aunt Cheryl have to show before those beach photos are technically classified as nudes and we have to have a third family intervention?
You wanna know why Cambridge Analytica happened?
Because it only takes one mouth-breathing relative to sell you out to the Russians by doing a quiz saying which Hogwarts house their dog would be in if it was a Sex In The City character.
By the way, I'm a total Hufflepuff bichon frise Charlotte.
So sure, get the world's best AI to troll the cesspools of Facebook But don't blame me when Skynet overthrows humanity with racist cat memes.
I'm Claire Riley for CNET, and don't say I didn't warn you.