Laptop Desk 2.0: Groin protector

If you're a laptop user you may be suffering from 'hot lap' -- a terrible condition that could seriously damage your private parts. But we've found a way to guard your nether regions

Rory Reid

It may seem like a slow news day when the world's finest technology blog dedicates pixels to a piece of plastic. We wouldn't normally stoop so low, but the Laptop Desk 2.0 groin protector has won us over with the dramatic health benefits it provides.

This slab of polycarbonate composite is designed to protect against 'hot lap', a very serious condition. According to a report on the BBC Web site, a Swedish scientist who rested his laptop on his lap for just an hour needed medical treatment for extensive blistering of his private parts. You'd think the average person would be able to tell when damage was being done to their nether regions, but apparently the critical parts in question lack the heat-sensory nerve fibres to detect when they're being scorched.

The Laptop Desk isn't solely a groin protector. It's also an angle-adjustable desktop stand. It'll let you select one of five ergonomically comfortable typing angles and raise the screen height of your laptop by 95mm, increasing productivity and reducing back and shoulder pain. It is also said to help your laptop run 20 per cent cooler thanks to a set of built-in ventilation channels that create a 'chimney effect'. The Lapworks Laptop Desk 2.0 costs around £25 -- a small price to pay, given the potential consequences. -RR