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What if Google was just a regular guy?

A hilarious, not-so-safe-for-work video imagines what an awful job it would be to handle all those search queries in person.

Eric Mack Contributing Editor
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What if Google was a person-to-person exchange? Video screenshot by Eric Mack/CNET

So we've got Santa handling hundreds of millions of gift requests a year, and a tooth fairy who thinks discarded chompers are some sort of biological bitcoin-like currency worth hoarding, but what if Google was also just some overburdened individual handling billions of search?

The comic masterminds at College Humor imagine the horror show that would be Google-the-guy's day at the office in this short, not-really-safe-for-work video.

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I think you'll recognize several figures from your life in the cast of characters who deliver their search queries to Google face-to-face, like the old guy searching for "gmail.com" or the writer obsessively searching for his name alongside various flattering adjectives.

Actually, never mind. I don't know anyone who would actually do that.

Enjoy the video below. And now that Google is purchasing Nest, look for the sequel, in which this poor schmuck is forced to sprint around turning everyone's furnaces down.