Velveeta Sells Cheese-Scented Nail Polish In Case You Want Cheese-Smelling Fingers

Or, you can just dip your fingers into melted Velveeta for the same effect.

Gael Cooper
CNET editor Gael Fashingbauer Cooper, a journalist and pop-culture junkie, is co-author of "Whatever Happened to Pudding Pops? The Lost Toys, Tastes and Trends of the '70s and '80s," as well as "The Totally Sweet '90s." She's been a journalist since 1989, working at Mpls.St.Paul Magazine, Twin Cities Sidewalk, the Minneapolis Star Tribune, and NBC News Digital. She's Gen X in birthdate, word and deed. If Marathon candy bars ever come back, she'll be first in line.
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Gael Cooper
2 min read

No, really. Velveeta now has cheese-scented nail polish. Not sure why one is the color of blood.

Velveeta/Nails Inc.

It seems like someone at Velveeta was double-dog-dared by someone from a nail-polish company, because the company famous for gloppy yellow "cheese product" is now making cheese-scented nail polish. Not a joke. Not an article from The Onion. You can really buy this stuff. Who wouldn't want to look like you selectively spilled melty cheese goop on all of your fingernails?

You have to buy the limited-edition polish in a two-pack. The yellow polish looks just like melted Velveeta, which makes sense. But it's paired with a red polish, which ... Velveeta isn't red, but whatever. The company calls it, "Finger Food Red." The two-pack sells for $15 (£11.96, AU$20).

"What's up mother forkers -- We're introducing the world to Velveeta Pinkies Out Polish, a red and yellow cheese-scented polish that's bold, over-the-top, and made to stand out with your smallest finger out," Velveeta said in a tweet. "That's #LaDolceVelveeta."

Velveeta notes that "the cheese scent will appear when (the polish is) fully dry."

The company also delivers one of those classic Department of "DUH" warnings, like "don't iron your clothes while you are still wearing them."

it reads, "While our polish is cheese-scented, it is (unfortunately) not made of Velveeta. Please don't eat it -- that's what cheesy, melty Velveeta is for!"

Hey, we understand people's confusion. After all, back in 2016, KFC offered nail polish that tastes like fried chicken. Not smells, TASTES. Finger-lickin'... aw, never mind.

If you're not bold enough to wear cheese-scented nail polish, you can also buy a  pack of Velveeta-themed stickers ($4.99, £3.99, AU$6.95) some of which make it LOOK as if you've dipped your nails in Velveeta.