Technically Incorrect offers a slightly twisted take on the tech that's taken over our lives.
Your pulse is likely a touch slower by now.
Though you wish you'd had an Apple Watch to tell you during Apple's event Monday that you're not having a heart attack.
Apple managed to insert a substantial amount of entertainment into 90 minutes of executives talking.
For me, what moved at least one of my eyebrows in a positive direction was the new MacBook. It wasn't just the sleekness, the slimness and the general air of ridiculous taste.
There was gold too. The mere concept of a gold laptop that doesn't cost $17,000 has an absurd attraction. You know you shouldn't want it. But you know you shouldn't be pining after that lover who only uses you for your intellect and your check shirt on a chilly morning.
In order to ooze you into its bosom a little further, Apple has already released an ad for this MacBook. It pulsates with gilded passion.
No, it doesn't just feature the gold version. But when that gold thing drifts around in slow motion like a space station created by a co-operative of Russian oligarchs and Miami nightclub owners, it whispers to you like a stranger at 3 a.m.
Come with me. You know you want me. You know you do. And tonight it's only $1,299.
You'll probably wondering why Apple chose not to use Spandau Ballet's "Gold" to lie beneath these pictures. Well, it could be because it's one of the more painful songs to have assaulted ears over the last 50 years.
However, it also dug up "Gold" by Chet Faker, which drips with late-night promise.
You gotta know, I'm feeling love / Made of gold, I never loved her / Another one, another you / It's gotta be love I said it.
Yes, he did say it. And how.
Even though this is yet another Apple ad in which the product is seen in close-up against a background of very little, put to music, this thing has got that additional allure of mystery.