On the show today: Dan the Mantern has his first day as the official 404 stenographer, a dude gets a girlfriend and sells off his entire videogame collection, Jeff finally agrees to give Justin his old PS2, Wilson introduces the worst story ever to infect the show, and a quick discussion of college mating rituals. Disney also has a bad week: Cinderella and Tinkerbell get cuffed in front of a hoard of screaming fans and the Disney fatcats "dive in" to little girls' underwear.
I'd like to give a warm welcome to the newest CNET TV Intern, Daniel Allen. He prefers "Dan," but please join me in calling him Dan the Mantern. As the unofficial 404 slave, he'll be taking notes, troubleshoot the camera, and waking me up after extended gaming discussions. Feel free to order him around, maybe grab you a cup of virtual coffee? Just kidding Dan, first rule of The 404: never take anything we say seriously. Dan will not be doing any sort of busywork, but you will hear him chime in from time to time on the show, hopefully he doesn't take any lessons from Wilson the "Monkey" man.
It's Friday today, so naturally we have a ton of fun and I believe that's two awesome shows in a row for us. Even though the girls of NewYork.com couldn't make it today, they'll be here next Tuesday, and besides- who needs beautiful women when you have fresh-out-of-college male intern? We start the show by poking a little fun at a guy who was auctioning off his 1700 piece video game collection on eBay...before it got taken down for some reason. My theory is that he got a girlfriend and she took one look at his collection and forced him to put it up on eBay. "No boyfriend of mine is gonna have THIS much fun," she said. But then he was like "Honey, I've been collecting this stuff for over 30 years now but I love you, like, so much, so I'll do it" but then halfway through the auction he chickened out and was like "Waiiiit a second, what the heckbeans am I even doing right now? Are you still interested in anything you were 30 years ago? I love this stuff more than you, so just stop trying to change me." Wait, was that a scene from "40 Year Old Virgin?" That's probably what happened anyway.
After talking way too much about videogames, I finally demand to be included and we come up with an excellent new segment for the show. Jeff will donate his old Playstation 2 to me and choose a list of top games for me play and give weekly updates on my progress. This is going to be great, I already have a few titles that Jeff's chosen for me. They include "Okami," "Shadow of the Colossus," "Resident Evil 4," and "God of War I and II." I have no idea what any of those words mean, but they'll become Yu household names very soon. Somehow I get the feeling that I'm going to open up a huge can of Haterade on each one of those titles, but I'll keep an open mind.
After discussing our sneaky steamy college exploitations (I'll leave that part out of this blog to preserve our young readers' eyes), we get into some bad news about Disney. I hate to speak ill of a company that's provided me with countless hours of joy and escape from the real world, but here at The 404 we're Fair and Balanced, so here goes nothing: Disney is under scrutiny from the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children after a grandmother complained about a pair of underwear she recently purchased for her granddaughter. The garment features promotional material for the popular movie "High School Musical" and has "Dive In" printed on them, BUT before you go jumping to conclusions, there's an ocean scene prominently displayed as well, so maybe everyone should just get their minds out of the gutter, huh? Maybe they should all read THIS!
This Friday show is also filled with many more stories- some perverse, some obscene, some offensive, but all fun and definitely SFW if you work for Howard Stern or Larry Flynt. Have an excellent weekend! (Seriously, Ryan Gosling was in "Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place," right?)
Oh yeah, one more thing: our buddy PacGamer used Go!Animate.com to bring a 404 promo to life, peep this and send in your submission for an opportunity to win some serious shwag:
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