I have never risen to such heights, but I understand that when men decide they will propose marriage to their beloved, they.
They wonder whether the ring should be buried in the creme brulee or the butterscotch pudding. They debate whether to go down on the left knee or the right. They agonize over whether the ring should be larger than two knuckles or three (especially in Texas).
However, a fine young Minnesotan called Chad Clay decided that his exquisite, lovely, wonderful flower of a girlfriend deserved something magical and revolutionary. Well, almost.
He created a fake iPhone ad (embedded below) and had it screened at the movie theater at which he and his life-partner had enjoyed their first movie together.
I go down on one knee to the St. Paul Pioneer Press, which revealed the intimate details of this moving proposal, made during a screening of "Going the Distance," a movie about a long-distance love that, well, goes.
The Press says that Chad's opening line to Vy Luong was one that I know many readers have turned to in a moment of passion: "Would you like to see my comic-book collection?"
From this tiny acorn, a tree of love grew.
According to Clay's own posting on YouTube, Luong had always wanted him to write a song for her, "a Top 40/Club type song." However, given that he doesn't possess George Michael's vocal cords, Clay allowed technology to hold his hand and his throat through the whole four-month process of creating his love song.
"I found it very convenient that AutoTune is very popular in this genre. Ha! I recorded and mixed everything in Pro Tools. No loops were used," he declared.
You might feel small parts of you straining at little at Clay's lyrical prowess. He did reach for rather ambitious ideas such as the vast attraction of Luong's braces. Some might also swoon at the notion that Clay and Luong "never fight."
However, his melody does most certainly have that disturbingly Top 40 feel. So much so that I believe that many of you, when you watch the embedded movie, will immediately become addicted and want to download the music for your own amorous purposes.
Here, I can help. For there is an iTunes download, the proceeds of which will, Clay said on YouTube, go to pay for the wedding. For Luong said "yes." How could she not?
While sending them Technically Incorrect's most heartfelt good wishes, I can only hope that no heartless lawyer from Apple is reading this and wondering whether, in the pursuit of true, lasting career advancement, there might be a copyright claim.