Apartment owner freaks at Airbnb 'XXX Freak Fest'
A New York comedian rents his apartment out on Airbnb. When he returns he discovers that he's been host to large people doing allegedly naked things. And wrecking his apartment.
Should you swear by Airbnb, this story might make you understand what happens when you want to swear at Airbnb.
This is the tale of New York comedian Ari Teman, who rented out his apartment on the famous site.
The renter was a man called "David." He was a verified member. Sadly, by the end of this tale, you may not be able to think of the phrase "verified member" in the same way again.
Teman described his experience fully on a special Tumblr feed dedicated to the Airbnb team.
It begins: "Usually I am a fan of your service. However, I have a minor bone to pick with you, in that it appears my apartment was reserved for some major boning."
It seems that the verified "David" who rented Temas's apartment had some verifiably Goliathan entertainment in mind for it. Indeed, this was to be the venue for an 'XXX Freak Fest," as Temas dubbed the event at his apartment.
I Googled what this might entail and I understand that it involves voluptuous women being volupted and corrupted. Or, at least, something like that.
I am fairly sure it rarely involves hosting one's brother and sister-in-law, which "David" allegedly insisted he was doing.
One can imagine that there would be considerable exertion involved, which might upset things such as furniture and neighbors.
Indeed, the story goes that Teman went out to dinner in New York and returned to his building to pick up his luggage before heading out of town.
He overheard that something was being "shut down" in his building -- indeed, in his own apartment. It was only then that he went up there and noticed what he says were $87,076 worth of losses.
Oh, and he's being evicted.
His furniture had apparently been taken into a back alley and tossed onto wet tar. Other pieces had simply been overturned or disassembled. An XXX freak fest needs more than a compact parking spot.
I'm not even going to go into the condoms. Other people have done that already.
Airbnb was not slow to respond to Teman's big, beautiful freakout. As Gawker reports, the company sent a locksmith over, put him up in a hotel, and wired Teman $23,817. All within 24 hours.
This is very different from its attitude two years ago when a woman's apartment was wrecked by an Airbnb renter.
The company also issued a statement that said in part:
We were appalled when we learned about this incident and we took immediate action to help this host. The individual who rented this space has been permanently removed from our site. We've reimbursed the host for damages to his apartment and ensured he has a new place to stay. In the days ahead, we'll continue to work with the host to assist him with his additional needs and we will work cooperatively with any law enforcement agencies that investigate this matter.
Gawker said it spoke to someone claiming to be "David." He insisted that he was allowed to have 50 guests (size immaterial, I assume). He also insisted there had been no party at all.
Naturally, Teman called the police. I don't believe strip searches were required.
Despite "David" being verified, Teman could, if he'd chosen, have researched his particulars and discovered details of previous XXX freak fests.
But that's the problem with verification. "David" already had a large number of positive Airbnb reviews. Some might now conclude these might have been largely concocted.
"David" himself, who has the last name Carter, told the NY Post: "I had six people, friends, and family. He is making a big to-do because he is being evicted." (Teman claims he saw 18 people there.)
Teman must now come to terms with knowing that his life and possessions have been besmirched.
"David," on the other hand, seems rather relaxed about the whole thing. He told the Post: "I was not arrested. I did nothing wrong."