Microsoft told you how old you are, but how dude are you?

Technically Incorrect: Women's private network Lulu decides to pay homage to Microsoft's How Old Are You site with a How Dude Are You?

Chris Matyszczyk
2 min read

Technically Incorrect offers a slightly twisted take on the tech that's taken over our lives.

There, doesn't that feel better? Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

It's been a struggle ever since Microsoft told me I was faceless.

Last week, the company's experimental How-Old.net site had failed to tell me my age because it had failed to recognize that I even had a head.

Still, others got great joy from the site. My good friend Lucy, aged fortysomething, was delirious when Redmond told her she was 29.

But for those of us who lost face on Microsoft's site, a new creation might save us.

It's called How-Dude.me. It exists to measure your very dudeness -- or should that be dude-itude?

I approached it gingerly. The Microsoft experience had left me contemplating counseling, plastic surgery and an increase in my Napa Valley cabernet intake.

I first tried the same picture as I had with Microsoft. The same result. I have no face. So I found another one. And lo, a high to behold.

I am an 81 percent dude. I am adventurous. I can emerge into the outside world again, confident that someone might find me interesting, even if they've had a few drinks and are reading Volume 4 of "Saga."

The site was created as a direct homage to Microsoft's. It's the handiwork of the R&D team at Lulu. This is a site that bills itself as "a private network for women to share their experiences and get information to make smarter decisions." About men, you understand.

Naturally, I am all in favor of women (and other beings) making smarter decisions. However, I am even more in favor when I discover that I'm 72 percent more dude than Aerosmith singer Steven Tyler. (The evidence is below.)

You might believe that everyone is at least 72 percent more dude than Steven Tyler. But the point of these sites is to compare yourself against the rest of humanity.

You come to How-Dude.me with the hope of turning your dubiousness into dudeiousness.

For one night only, I have won. I am grateful.

Uncharted can never compete with adventurous. Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET