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Madonna banned by movie theater for alleged movie texting

The singer reportedly buries herself in her BlackBerry during the premiere of the movie "12 Years a Slave." Some complain. She explains it was for business. One famous movie theater chain bans her in protest.

Madonna. Enslaved?
Madonna/YouTube screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

"It's just business" is an explanation that claims to cover a million deadly sins.

Anything from betrayal to betrothal.

In the case of renowned filmmaker and occasional singer Madonna, she reportedly used business as the reason she texted her way through the New York premiere of "12 Years A Slave."

However, as the New York Post's unimpeachable Page Six reported, the singer allegedly offered a further retort to someone who asked her to shush like a virgin and shut off her phone.

She is said to have accused her accuser of being an "enslaver."

Perhaps this was attempted wit. But how odd that she might choose such terminology. Some might offer that she seems to be something of a slave not to the rhythm, but to her BlackBerry.

In retaliation, one theater owner has decided that she should no longer be enslaved by the confines of a movie theater. The esteemed Alamo Drafthouse movie theater organization has decided to ban Madonna until she apologizes for her material tendencies.

As the Guardian reports, this banning may be merely symbolic. How likely is it that Madonna would waft into, say, the Alamo Drafthouse in Austin, Texas?

However, the Drafthouse is America's foremost crusader against texting in movie theaters.

In a milestone for both culture and public shaming, the movie theater once created a PSA featuring an irate movie-texter. (I have embedded this work of art below.)

This lady had been removed from a Drafthouse after texting. She had then left a voice mail, which Drafthouse CEO Tim League thought expressed the mentality and morality of movie-texters to the full.

League admitted to Entertainment Weekly that his initial idea of banning Madonna was something of a joke.

Then his tone took on a harder aspect: "Now that it seems to have taken hold, sure, I'm going to enforce it."

Mind you, he did originally tweet: "Madonna, however entitled she feels she is, is unbearably rude to others around her by texting in a theater."

There is, in all this, a word of warning to those at the very epicenter of smartphones and human disregard.

Very soon, an Alamo Drafthouse will be opening in San Francisco.