Justin Bieber's iPhone: What will the police find?

While investigating an alleged egging of a neighbor's house, police seize Justin Bieber's iPhone in search of, well, messages egging on the egging. The star, though, is said to be in fear of what else the police might find.

Chris Matyszczyk
2 min read
This is Justin Bieber, a nanosecond after he put his iPhone in his pants. Seriously. Sara Tomlinson/YouTube screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

Look, you might be spending your time worrying about your job, your family, or the long-lost love who ditched you for a dolt.

Millions in the world have a far greater worry: Does Justin Bieber's iPhone contain revealing, risque, or even ribald images that will make their pulses soar?

Should you have failed to catch up to contemporary culture, the police made themselves acquainted with Bieber's abode after a neighbor complained that $20,000 worth of damage had been done by persons unknown allegedly egging their property.

Yes, of course this was in LA. Calabasas, if you want to be picky.

Some fear that the police might be very picky indeed -- for as part of their investigation, they took Bieber's precious iPhone.

As ABC News reports, they claim to be seeking evidence of him or others egging on the alleged egging.

You and I know, though, that in their spare time the police are human beings. How can they not have curiosity about, say, unclothed snaps or discreet messages to, say, Taylor Swift?

The police are oddly defensive about such an insinuation -- one that may have been stimulated by TMZ reporting that Bieber was afraid of naked pictures being ogled.

He's moreover allegedly concerned that there might be the odd textual reference to substances of a potentially illegal kind.

The police want that thought to perish. A spokeswoman for the LA County Sheriff's Office told ABC News: "We are looking for evidence of the crime, and that's it. We are very strict on the handling of evidence. Not just his, but on anybody's phone."

Oh, but we've watched cop shows since we were born. Sometimes, blind eyes cannot be turned, no matter how stiff the discipline.

Bieber's phone is reportedly password protected. A crack tech team will be handling it with alleged care.

And so the world holds its collective breath, wondering what images might leak into the light of day, be it through the keyhole of TMZ or the National Enquirer.

Meanwhile, the gross national product suffers.