Audi wins the Super Bowl

While the Saints lifted the trophy, a little necessary roughness directed at the sanctimonious showed that, gosh, brand advertising can still sprinkle a little holy water.

You, your family, or those frightfully wobbly people with you in the sports bar or king size hotel room, surely had your own views about which Super Bowl ads moved your internal dial.

I was esconsced on a cliff with cordon bleu guacamole prepared by a wickedly witty Texan and a flat screen with small but bracing speakers. From my vantage point, it seemed clear that Audi's "Green Police" spot would be the only one I would remember in a positive light come Monday's clouds, rain and headache.

There is little more painful than the saintly righteousness heaped by those who use the idea that the world is ending in order to shame you into a guilt even your Catholic faith never managed.

As Audi introduced such crimes as the "compost infraction" and "incandescent lightbulb possession," the company's image rose high above that of those who tried to use crudity, underpants, more underpants, bad (as in unfunny) sexist jokes, animals, children, more animals and a college quarterback trying to tackle his mother to further their cause.

And that long list doesn't even include the cesspit of vacuousness that is GoDaddy.com.

A distant second was Dodge Charger, which, through powerful, true writing and some amusingly pained performances, made one believe that the Dodge brand might, indeed, have some life.

Google's safe, sweet, blissfully conventional attempt did nothing to harm its nascent attempts at entering the world of humanity. And Motorola tried hard. Well, if you can call paying Megan Fox a lot of money to sit in a bath and utter a couple of sentences "trying hard."

Intel, too, didn't offend with its joke at the expense of a robot. Any joke at the expense of a robot offers hope.

However, if you, too, are fed up with curly coiffed 18-year-old boys attempting to tell you to throw trash into the right-colored can and boasting of their ability to get their Prius to coast on the freeway, then the Audi spot might just be for you.

I think I'll test drive one Monday. Even though it's supposed to be green. Now that's the power of advertising.