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Apple iWatch, I mean the Apple, Apple Watch, whatever.
Now that we've seen it and all been dazzled by the obscene amount of beautiful slow motion close up shots it's impossible not to have lustful gadget cravings for this thing.
That's where I come in.
Old Donald Bell here.
It's gonna be the cold shower you need to clean that Apple Watch from your brain.
Let's count down five reasons you shouldn't buy it.
Starting off at number five, it's expensive.
Starts at $349.
And you know that's the model you don't want.
Once you start decking it out with a leather watch band and a bigger screen, you've probably got a $500 watch on your arm.
If i'm dropping that kind of cash, this thing better shoot lasers.
Like, the deadly kind.
And number four, is iPhone only.
Not only will it not work properly without a phone, but it won't work with any phone aside from an iPhone five or above.
So now your paying $350 for a watch that essentially prevents you from switching to Android.
It's brilliant.
Coming in at number three, the battery.
Unlike those dumb old watches that have been refined for centuries, your smartwatch requires daily charging from a funky proprietary cable.
And just like your phone, daily charging means that battery will inevitably wear out.
Your overpriced smartwatch probably has a lifespan of about five to ten years, while a $50 dumbwatch could probably outlive your grandchildren.
Progress.
And number 2, your phone.
You know,.
That thing you've been using to figure out what time it is for the past ten years.
Did you know that it also takes and receives calls, text messages, emails, gives you directions, and tracks your health, plays music?
It does it all and it fits conveniently in your pocket.
If you're feeling retro, go buy yourself a Casio.
Now before we get to number one reason not to buy an Apple Watch.
How about we get to one great reason why you should buy it?
Nerd fashion!
You'll be the king of the early adopting nerds.
And unlike a cool new phone that spends most of its time hidden away in your pocket, the watch is designed to be a flashy emblem of your nerd pride that you can admire all day long.
And don't worry, there's no way you'll be ridiculed like those Google Glass people.
It's not like this obviously call attention to your sense of superiority, you disposable income, or a lack of common sense.
It's a totally different thing.
All right.
And now, the number one reason you should just say no to the Apple Watch The Apple Watch 2.
Remember how the iPhone went from a toy to a 3G phone with real GPS?
Remember how the iPad 2 was about half the thickness of the original?
History has shown us over and over that Apple is exceedingly great at making second generation products [INAUDIBLE] So just wait.
So there you go, five reasons to save your money and skip the Apple watch.
For more information on smart watches and all manner of wearables head over to the wearables tech section of cnet and for more top 5's from me top5.cnet.com.
I'm Donald Bell, thanks for watching.
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