Buzz Report: The sky is falling!
Ok! Hi, I'm Molly Wood, and welcome to the Buzz Report. Ladies and gentlemen ... I
come before you today as the United States teeters on the brink of disaster. Our financial
markets are in a tailspin ... our politicians caught in a shame spiral of partisan monkey
hooting. it just wouldn't be appropriate at this time for me to engage in irresponsible and
meaningless talk of the "gadget of the week" and the trivial technologies stories that
caught my fancy like so many shiny river stones.
But a sense of appropriateness has never stopped me before. And that's why ... I'm Molly
Wood and welcome to the Buzz Report WHO CARES EDITION!! Mindless escapism
and crass consumerism at its best ... the most expensive gadgets, the most scurrilous
rumors, and guilt-free geek enjoyment. Join me, won't you, for the Gadget of the Week.
The Gadget of the Week is the Pioneer Elite Kuro Pro-111FD, the best flat-panel HDTV
EVER! We gave it a 10 in picture quality. A PERFECT 10. It's got the best black levels
we have EVER SEEN on a TV! And it costs five grand. That's right. FIVE THOUSAND
DOLLARS. That's like ... three weeks worth of gas or at least a couple of mortgage
payments, but the HELL with it! Get the TV! Perfect 10, baby!
Now for the news, and it's expensive gadget central! According to the Boy Genius
Report, Best Buy may have leaked the release date for the BlackBerry Bold ... and if the
report is true, it's coming soon! October 26th in fact, with a rumored price tag of six
hundred dollars! Ahh, what do you care. Pony up, it's the BOLD!
In other phone news, Apple is now selling an official, unlocked version of the iPhone in
Hong Kong. The 16-gigabyte version is almost eight hundred dollars ... probably a lot
more if you tried to buy one there and import it. But ... it's unlocked! It's so much better!
You can run the unlocked iPhone 3G on T-Mobile ... I think they've got 3G in like .. three
cities now! But who cares if it's not fast. It's unlocked! Do it! Do it!
New in CNET reviews this week, the gas-guzzling, terrain-chewing 2009 Range Rover
Sport! Sixty grand ... BASE. Six miles to the gallon. Who CARES? HOT!
Also this week, a victory for private industry ... SpaceX, or Space Exploration
Technologies successfully launched the first privately developed liquid-fueled rocket into
orbit. I wonder how much they'll cost for a ride in it ... I don't care, I'll pay it. Get me off
this rock.
And finally, in other news of desperate money-grubbing, Hollywood studios filed a
lawsuit against RealNetworks over Real's $30 software that lets you make a digital copy
of a DVD. Yeah, no, they really did. And it happened after Real sued the studios because
they knew the studios were going to sue them, because this ground-breaking piece of
software that lets you make ONE copy of a DVD is going to SHATTER the industry
forever, even though there are DOZENS of free programs that let you do the exact same
thing and honestly, at this point, does anyone even CARE that it's breaking the law to rip
a DVD? Would anyone even BUY this software? I mean ... who CARES?
I'm Molly Wood and this has been the Buzz Report. Thanks for watching.
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