May I wiggle my bottom while being honest with you?
I have never heard the following phrase: "I am phabulously, phenomenally phlabbergasted with my phablet."
Indeed, though I have seen the word written down and projected upon my eyes, I have never, ever heard anyone actually say "phablet".
Perhaps it's like "parenthesis" and "prestidigitation." Words that strike eyes, but never leave mouths. It could be that no one actually knows what their phone-tablet hybrid is really called.
I mention this, bottom awiggle, because news reaches me that "phablet" had now entered the hallowed p(h)ortals of the Oxford Dictionaries.
It is one of a number of relatively new words that have sprinted into recognition. In a blog post, the Oxfordites say they have expedited some words that are "buzzworthy." (Yes, that is indeed, one of them.)
Would you believe that "srsly" is now in there? Srsly.
"Selfie," "emoji" and "digital detox" also waltz in there as if they owned the place. Yes, emoji, the means by which the barely literate express their base emotions, now has official recognition.
"Bitcoin" makes it. As does "fomo." You don't know what "fomo" means? Oh, you're really missing out there.
Just as the tech world is taking over the world and turning human beings into low-level engineers -- next step: totally manipulable robots -- so humanity is inventing hardly any new vocabulary of its own.
Which is why my bottom just cannot help waving itself in front of you and wiggling.
I am an enormous supporter of humanity and especially of the very human Miley Cyrus -- surely you are still in the thrall of her wonderful performance at the VMAs.
I am therefore delighted to announce that alongside all this tech jargon, "twerking" has also bounced into the Oxford Dictionaries.