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McDonald's learns hard lesson: Don't let the internet name your products

Want slurs with your fries? Learn from Boaty McBoatface. An online promotion tasted pretty terrible for a McDonald's New Zealand site.

McDonald's New Zealand quickly scrubbed the naughtily named burgers from its site, so here are some good old-fashioned standard sandwiches.

So you want to be a corporate marketing person, huh? Here's the one rule you should recite every day. Call it the "Boaty McBoatface" law. It's simple, and it could save your job: Do Not Let The Internet Name Your Products.

That doesn't just mean "don't have an open contest where your serious polar-research vessel can end up carrying a name that sounds like a 2-year-old picked it." It also means "don't auto-tweet random things the internet sends you on your corporate account, because there will be slurs."

And really, don't let customers type in anything that's going to go right up on your site or out on your social media unedited.

McDonald's New Zealand learned the importance of the Boaty McBoatface law Wednesday when the company launched a "Create Your Taste" promotion and let internet users design a burger, name it and then see that burger appear on the restaurant's site.

That page has been taken down, but Dorkly saved a few screengrabs. Body parts, political commentary, sex jokes, fat jokes, religion jokes -- the whole crowd showed up. "The Sad European" and "Bag of Lettuce" are some of the few names McD New Z was handed that we can actually share.

Now that McDonald's New Zealand has torn that page from its site as if it were a crumpled-up cheeseburger wrapper, we kind of want to dine there. What are those freaky chocolate and banana shakes with fudge swirls that they're advertising, and why don't we have them in America? Bring them on over! We promise to name them for you.