Passive-aggressive gifts for tardy geeks (photos)

Wondering what to get for the dawdlers in your life? Here are some gifts that might finally get them to arrive on time.

Buchanan

Nov. 25, 2009 5:23 p.m. PT

1 of 8

Sonic Alert

Sonic Bomb Alarm Clock

Know someone who can never get anywhere on time? With the chronically tardy in mind, Gizmodo rounded up a list of gifts for dawdlers, and CNET is reprinting it with permission. Wondering what to get the late loved one in your life? Read on.

Step one to showing up on time is getting up on time, and there's simply no way to ignore the siren song Sonic Bomb Alarm Clock from Sonic Alert. The 113dB blast from this $43 gizmo is almost as loud as a jet plane, and it shakes the entire bed, traumatically jolting even the utterly comatose to life. It's also simply a horrible way to wake up.

Read more in our related article: "Passive-aggressive gifts for chronically late geeks"

2 of 8

ThinkGeek

Jolt caffeinated gum

Late people don't have time to make coffee or brush their teeth. Jolt's spearmint gum ($3-$10) takes care of caffeine and fresh breath in seconds. Sorta.

Read more in our related article: "Passive-aggressive gifts for chronically late geeks"

3 of 8

Vibram

Vibram FiveFingers sprint shoes

When all else fails--like public transit in New York City--sometimes you've just gotta sprint to where you're going.

Vibram's FiveFingers shoes are the footies of choice for Google's Sergey Brin, and the center of a hippie natural-running movement. Also, the hideousness should make you run even faster to wherever you're going.

Read more in our related article: "Passive-aggressive gifts for chronically late geeks"

4 of 8

Namco

5 Second Stadium

As passive-aggressive as it gets, Namco's $14 5 Second Stadium is a gift that says, "Can't you learn how to tell time, assclown?"

Read more in our related article: "Passive-aggressive gifts for chronically late geeks"

5 of 8

Gizmodo

Motorola Droid

Why a Droid? Two reasons: Using Google Navigation on Android 2.0, nobody can claim they got lost, and on Google Latitude, everybody knows exactly where you are.

Read more in our related article: "Passive-aggressive gifts for chronically late geeks"

6 of 8

Tokyoflash

Tokyoflash watches

Tokyoflash watches look awesome, but no one call tell what the hell time it is with these things.

Read more in our related article: "Passive-aggressive gifts for chronically late geeks"

7 of 8

Casio

Casio G-Shock watches

Casio's $110 G-Shock watches withstand serious abuse and drowning, so excuses like, "Oh, I broke my watch" won't exactly fly. And uh, neon green's a real hard color to ignore.

Read more in our related article: "Passive-aggressive gifts for chronically late geeks"

8 of 8

Amazon

Hermione's Time Turner

This is our fantasy gift, and we're talking about the real thing, not the $50 knock-off on Amazon (pictured). Turn back time, and arrive everywhere right when you're supposed to. Oh, who am I kidding? I'd still be late.

Read more in our related article: "Passive-aggressive gifts for chronically late geeks"