Perhaps I watch the wrong TV shows.
Perhaps the subliminal machinators on high know that I've just upgraded to yet another wonderfully simple and understandable Nokia.
But I've yet to see the new Palm Pre ads on TV.
However, there seems to have been such a wondrous outpouring of bile in their direction that it was only a matter of time before I suffered some splatter.
So I wafted off to YouTube to see what all the puss was about. What I saw was a rather ethereal woman's head whispering to me in a way that, frankly, I wish so many people would, but don't.
Too many ads shout, sing, stomp, and shove their shrill shill in the direction of your eyes, your gullet or simply your wallet.
At least this series, featuring an actress who looks like a rather sweet offspring of Tilda Swinton, has a heart.
Palm Pre is trying to tell you this one little thing: "Bloody hell, this portable telephony cacophony is getting out of hand. Buy a Palm Pre. It's like a pleasant waft of marijuana in a very nutty world."
This seems to me like a perfectly reasonable suggestion.
Here is a phone that appears to offer a fussless way to navigate the less than still waters of your daily existence.
The lady is whispering because you'd like a little calm in your life. You'd like a little sense in your day. And you'd like not to have to leap on every new video of a golfer passing wind as if it was the second passing of superior humor.
This campaign is not, as some have suggested, aimed specifically at women any more than the KFC logo is aimed specifically at white Southern chaps with rifles.
Of course, the agency that created the work, Modernista! (oh, yes, do they need that exclamation point!), claims it was inspired by the opening ceremony of the Beijing Olympics and it wants everyone to be talking about its work.
However, what it's really created for Palm Pre is an atmosphere, a mood, a pleasant order of things, a relief that so many people crave.
One suspects that many of those who accuse this work of being creepy enjoy movies where animated animals suck blood and speak in tongues. These people are also often afraid of clowns.
Of course, these things are always subjective. But you want creepy, my friends? Politicians are creepy.