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The 404 757: Where we crash your Valentine's date (podcast)

It's the most miserable day of the year, aka Christmas 2.0, so we're Debbie Downing with all anti-Valentine stories like anaphrodisiac recipes, a dating site for STD victims, and techy deal breakers for men and women!

A dude's dozen roses.

To celebrate the most miserable day of the year, aka Christmas 2.0, we're being Debbie Downers and checking out stories to ruin your cheesy holiday. If you're not hitched up with a honey bunny today, you may be able to increase your chances of bagging someone special based on the next gadget you buy.

Now playing: Watch this: Ep. 757: Where we crash your Valentine's date

According to this Gadgetology study, your computer, cell phone, and other tech accessories are big factors in determining your attractiveness to the people around you. Of the men surveyed under the age of 35, 50 percent find women with fancy smartphones more attractive, whereas 38% of women think a modern laptop oozes the most sex appeal.

And this is no surprise, but the two worst tech deal breakers for women are the awful Bluetooth wireless headset and cell phone holster, so steer clear of those two if you're looking to hook up. Finally, outside of the tech world, more women younger than 35 say they're attracted to a man walking a cute dog than a geek with a cool smartphone, so we're kind of screwed either way.

On the other hand, if you want to avoid sex altogether this year, the best way to accomplish that goal is to trick your partner by cooking them a dinner made of anaphrodisiac ingredients.

You can kill the mood with a number of ingredients including hops, marjoram, common rue, soy, and coriander, or you can really play it safe with a combination of it all in a deliciously platonic chicken and tofu in a marjoram cream sauce.

A anti-touch relationship is a good way to practice safe sex altogether, but what if a painful health affliction is preventing you from getting yours? A dating Web site based out of Winnipeg is playing Cupid for clients that suffer from herpes.

Actually, you don't have to have herpes to join. According to the creators, hopeful clients are asked during registration if they have it and if they'd be open to someone with it for full transparency. According to the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention, about one in six people between the ages of 14 and 49 suffer from the STD and are embarrassed to admit it to lovers, so Camelot Introductions offers this service to dispel the prejudice.

But all that aside, if you're a super procrastinator and still haven't purchased your boo a gift, consider a New York solution and just name a cockroach after your Valentine.

Episode 757

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