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Texas-style chips are better than toasted browsers

Whenever I'm tired of high-tech industry hype, I perk myself up with a little light reading like a public company's 10-Q report. Often these documents are brutally honest. It's where a company lays its warts, wounds, and worries out for all of its shareholders to examine.

    Whenever I'm tired of high-tech industry hype, I perk myself up with a little light reading like a public company's 10-Q report. Often these documents are brutally honest. It's where a company lays its warts, wounds, and worries out for all of its shareholders to examine.

    This weekend, I amused myself by reading Apple's 10-Q, the one that got so much ink last week for detailing the rivers of blood running from the company's coffers. In the document, Apple cryptically warns of product cuts, saying that "the company expects to reduce the number of new product introductions and the number of products in certain categories within its current product portfolio."

    Where will the machete fall at Apple? My spies are woefully silent on this so I can only imagine which existing products will get cut. My guess: Apple will lose a Newton model or two.

    Company 10-Qs can only interest me for a while, and then I must do what every person in my demographic group does on Sunday nights: watch The X-Files. Coincidentally, during the show, I unexpectedly channeled the spirit of Jean-Louis Gassée. Frankly, it felt great, and my French was suddenly flawless. After rambling on in front of my son Vermel about Apple's acquisition of Next, I concluded by saying, "Well, it was one hell of a tax write-off."

    I suppose l'espirit de Gassée was referring to Be's fortunes now that Apple doesn't want it anymore. Could Gassee have really said that? Unfortunately, I'm no longer able to channel his spirit to ask him, though I can pick up the PointCast Network.

    I was able, however, to channel the complaints of users brave enough to test the "preview release" (with the emphasis on the preview) of Netscape Communicator. I sensed that users were deleting the browser from their systems because it's too memory-hungry. I also felt the browser causing terrible printing problems, particularly for people with HP and Panasonic printers, resulting in GPFs galore.

    Later, I tuned into the thoughts of the manager of a Texas Instruments microchip plant. I sensed that the company is planning to release a new "super chip" that is 20 times faster than a Pentium 200 Mhz sometime in July. That was enough channeling to make me pass out. When I awoke, Vermel was fanning me with a rolled-up 10-Q form. I'm channeling your thoughts right now. You have a filthy mind, now email me your rumors.