Why be sheepish when you can be sheeplike?
There's nothing more painful than seeing someone parading a fine bag, purse, pair of sneakers, or halter-neck wrestling outfit on Instagram and not knowing right away where you can buy it. Now. This instant.
So along comes amateur psychologist Jonathan Stoikovitch.
He freely admits he suffers from capitalist dementia. He told me: "I follow a lot of people on Instagram and would spot things I wanted to buy all of the time, without any real way to do so."
The angst, the pain, the emotional constipation.
But Stoikovitch is a man of today and tomorrow. So he created something called Brandicted. This offers a tagline that every capitalist victim can stand behind: See It. Want It. Buy It.
You might already be salivating at the concept that your needs might be instantly met the minute you espy a glorious branded item on Instagram.
So here's how it works. Brandicted's technology spends its whole day curb-crawling Instagram. The minute it begins to see that a product is becoming popular, it raises the alarm. Indeed, it imports photos every 40 minutes, using the Instagram API.
Then it filters the photos based on keywords, the number of likes, and the comments the photo has received. It takes in only photos that are tagged with brand names.
Stoikovitch described this process technically to me as: "filtering out the crap."
Once it finds these spectacularly popular items, it displays them for you on Brandicted and tells you where you can buy them. It helps if you've already told Brandicted what your favorite brands are.
Currently, it crawls Instagram for photos and Amazon for products.
This, for you, may be the solution to so many of your existential issues. For me, I get stuck on the brand name.
Stoikovitch pronounces it "brandickted."
When I look at it, I see "brandighted." Yes, as in "indicted."
I conclude, therefore, that Brandicted is the perfect indictment of a voyeuristic, materialistic society.
It's just a must, isn't it?