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Scientists to map Ozzy Osbourne's DNA

A genome sequencing company will try discover how--after a lifetime of bodily abuse--this man is still among the living.

We all have some kind of relationship with our bodies.

Sometimes, let's admit, it can be abusive. We put cupcakes, cocaine, cognac, cauliflower, and cigarette smoke in there (well, not always all at once), and we somehow expect our bodies to love it.

One man, though, has perhaps stood above all others when it comes to testing the body's limits. That is Ozzy Osbourne, former lead singer of Black Sabbath, husband of Sharon, and one-time spokesman for World of Warcraft.

Osbourne has, at least in the past, thought nothing of a live bat as hors d'oeuvre, a live dove as main course, and a quart of Grey Goose as dessert. We don't even need to delve into his between-meal snacks.

What is scientifically fascinating about a man of such eclectic excess is that, well, he's still alive.

So now a genome sequencing company called Knome has decided to find out just what Ozzy Osbourne is really made of. It intends to test his DNA to see what kind of strange genetic makeup it contains that might explain Osbourne's very survival.

According to Sky News, he will be lucky enough to be one of the very few people in the world to have his entire genome analyzed.

The process should take around three months. One of the many areas around which Knome will reportedly focus its fascination is just how one man's body can soak up and survive so much drug use.

Nathan Pearson, Knome's director of research, told Sky News: "Sequencing and analyzing individuals with extreme medical histories provides the greatest potential scientific value."

Osbourne is now 61, so I'm not sure what took these scientists so long in getting around to examining his astounding internal makeup. I can only hope that they will discover something that will enlighten all of us as to just what we should and shouldn't and can and can't do with and to our bodies.

I have embedded one of his more passionate performances of the seminal "Paranoid," in order for you to focus on what it may lurk inside Ozzy. Is he really singing all on his own there? Or are there several Ozzys inhabiting this world and fooling us all, including the scientific community?