Playboy without naked DD-list celebrities is like a cupcake store that only serves coffee.
At least that is what one might imagine. Now, one no longer has to rely on one's imagination, because I am informed by Fox News that Playboy is determined to capture your eyeballs while you struggle with your daily cubicled lives.
It has therefore launched a new site, sans the obvious pneumatic allure. TheSmokingJacket.com, which is, I believe, something of a reference to Playboy founder Hugh Hefner's penchant for wandering around in such a garment, is still quite obviously essential male viewing.
Who could not be rapt at a headline such as "How to get laid at work"? Who could not be entirely engrossed in an article that begins "7 signs that you've given up on getting laid."
Please, just bathe in its opening paragraph: "When you boil a man down to his core essence, the desire to get laid drives everything. Without it, there is no motivation to excel, succeed, or be relevant."
This, I am sure, is a principle that, for example, Google is driven by to this day.
Jimmy Jellinek, Playboy's editorial director, explained to Fox News that this site is "basically a jukebox of cool." It will, apparently, be a place from which you can safely share the funny, the bizarre, the simply viral. It is, according to the words of the site's lead producer, Matt Gibbs, to Fox News: "the go-to site for those who are bored at work."
It seems that the word "Playboy" might fall foul of certain unsporting firewalls put up by unscrupulous employers who believe that fun is something not to be had in the hours of work.
So TheSmokingJacket.com neatly avoids any mention of the actual word. However, its five main headings--Girls, Entertainment, Sex, Videos, Lifestyle--neatly capture the vast spectrum of a young man's cranium. Although, I am fairly sure that Lifestyle tends merely to encompass the other four.
I am sure this new and exciting venture will cause many, many ripples across the world's places of work in the days and weeks to come. Yes, ripples.