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New Samsung ad to iPhone users: You're featureless

The latest attempt by Samsung to make iPhone users look small is not to denigrate them, but to demonstrate, yes, features.

So one of these guys has a GS4. The other is dull and bald. Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

Whenever you get on a plane, you always want to know what your phone seatmate's got, don't you?

You slide one eye across just to check whether they're as tastefully forward as you are.

If it's a phone you're interested in -- and your seatmate doesn't smell so bad -- you might ask about it. If it's a BlackBerry, you go back to texting your lover that you miss her more than ten-color rainbows.

This is the encounter upon which Samsung has based its latest attempt to make iPhone users feel a touch inadequate.

There's no direct denigration of them -- unlike in previous ads. This time, it's a little more subtle.

The people with GS4's are impossibly handsome. The people without Samsung's latest fine phone are bald and a little older, or they're desperately nerdy, disheveled, large-bladdered ginger-ale obsessives.

This latest iteration of Samsung's advertising makes like Quasimodo shouting: "The Bells! The Bells!" This, before adding: "The Whistles! The Whistles!"

For it's a celebration of Smart Pause, Smart Switch, and that smart wave you can make with your hands to make your phone go abracadabra.

You'd think Apple would, just for the sheer fun of it, offer an extra-loud alarm system called the Dumb Bell.

The ad itself seems a little less smart than many of Samsung's recent offerings. There's no truly fine laugh.

It's almost as if the iPhone 5 vs. GS4 battle is getting a little tired. When are the next phones coming out again?