Never fall back asleep again, ever

The "Alertmaster" is marketed for the hard of hearing, but judging from the number of extreme alarm clocks on the market (including ones that fly and run away), it may catch on with the general consuming public as well. This one uses "a flashing lamp, a bed shaker and vibrating personal signaler," to get one's attention, according to Uber-Review. But if that's still not enough, you can also get a "Vibrating Alarm Watch" to keep you awake 24/7.