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Toothy terror: Fish with human-like teeth found in Michigan

Horror-movie quality pacu is native to South America, so stop dumping them in our lakes and rivers, aquarium owners.

Gael Cooper
CNET editor Gael Fashingbauer Cooper, a journalist and pop-culture junkie, is co-author of "Whatever Happened to Pudding Pops? The Lost Toys, Tastes and Trends of the '70s and '80s," as well as "The Totally Sweet '90s." She's been a journalist since 1989, working at Mpls.St.Paul Magazine, Twin Cities Sidewalk, the Minneapolis Star Tribune, and NBC News Digital. She's Gen X in birthdate, word and deed. If Marathon candy bars ever come back, she'll be first in line.
Expertise Breaking news, entertainment, lifestyle, travel, food, shopping and deals, product reviews, money and finance, video games, pets, history, books, technology history, generational studies. Credentials
  • Co-author of two Gen X pop-culture encyclopedia for Penguin Books. Won "Headline Writer of the Year"​ award for 2017, 2014 and 2013 from the American Copy Editors Society. Won first place in headline writing from the 2013 Society for Features Journalism.
Gael Cooper
2 min read
red-bellied-pacu-smalloriginal.jpg

Wonder if the pacu flosses?

Michigan DNR

It's like one of those unnerving YouTube videos come to life: You know the ones, where human mouths are superimposed on animals. But it's creepily real.

The South American red-bellied pacu, a popular aquarium fish with horrifically human-like teeth, has been pulled out of two separate bodies of water in Michigan, the state's Department of Natural Resources reported Tuesday.

This horror-movie-ready swimmer is not new to the US -- it's kind of starring in a sequel. Last summer, the pacu was reeled in by a New Jersey angler, much to the delight of those who still get into making Jersey jokes. As we reported at the time, the pacu has been labeled a "testicle-biter," though that seems to be kind of unfounded (it's a vegetarian).

The toothy terror has actually been found in 27 states, the Michigan DNR said, and they blame aquarium owners, who perhaps feel guilty (or panicked?) as the fish grows larger in their perhaps-too-small tanks, and decide that freeing it is a good option. Spoiler: It's not.

"Pet release is almost never humane," said Nick Popoff, manager of the Michigan DNR's Aquatic Species and Regulatory Affairs Unit, on the group's website. "Those that do succeed in the wild can spread exotic diseases to native animals. In the worst-case scenario, released animals can thrive and reproduce, upsetting natural ecosystems to the degree that these former pets become invasive species." It's also illegal, he points out, to put any fish in state waters without a permit.

So either don't get these fangy fishies in the first place, or keep them in your tank. And maybe teach them to floss.