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Majority of young people online for no reason, study says

A Pew Research Center study shows that 53 percent of 18- to 29-year-olds are online because, well, they are.

Young people, when asked to justify so many of their actions, often offer: "No reason."

So why could anyone raise their arms and cant calamity merely because of a new Pew Research Center study revealing that on any given day 53 percent of young people (aged 18-29) say they go online for absolutely no identifiable reason whatsoever?

I am unaccountably grateful to the Associated Press for unearthing this educative gem.

The study delved as deeply as one can into the minds of these mindless, rudderless, and very possibly jobless humans.

The Web surely offers infinite mental stimulation. Screenshot: Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

It showed that the younger you are, the more likely it is that you go online to do, well, something. Something undefined, indefinable and perhaps definitely indefinite.

To be fair, older adults aren't always filled with great purpose, according to the survey. For those 30 to 49 years old, 37 percent said they went online the previous day for "no particular reason, just for fun or to pass the time." For 50- to 64-year-olds, it was 27 percent, but for those 65 and older it was 12 percent. (The survey of 2,260 adults was conducted by telephone from July 25 to August 26.)

The Web, for so many, seems to have replaced the mall, the bar, and the street corner as the place to go just to hang out and wait for something to happen.

The question is whether something ever does or whether they log on in hope and expectation, only to be forever disappointed.

The only other question is that if they are disappointed, why do they go back again? Could it be that the external world has permanently ceased to give them joy?

Could it be that parents, teachers, government, and lovers have all let them down?

Or could it be that these are the most indolent human beings to have been engendered on this planet since, well, congresspeople?