It's official. Stephen Hawking is evil

Technically Incorrect: In a new ad for Jaguar, the famed astrophysicist reveals his dark side.

Technically Incorrect offers a slightly twisted take on the tech that's taken over our lives.


He's evil, I tell you. Truly evil.

Advert Ge/YouTube screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

Many scientists profess to be committed to truth.

We know they strive for objectivity and enlightenment, but they're human. So, there must lurk some dark and twisted minds in the field of science.

Finally, we have some proof. And it concerns one of the world's most famous scientists, Stephen Hawking.

He's not as much of a do-gooder as you think. Indeed, in a new Jaguar ad, he's the repository of all evil.

The campaign has been going for some time. The idea behind it is that it always seems to be Brits who play the bad guys in movies.

This is surely understandable. All those stiff lips and polite words are merely masks for colonialists and empire-builders. (Disclosure: I still have a British passport. I'm allowed to say that.)

Here, Hawking lives in a glorious bad-guy pad in the hills.

He's not one to joke around. At least, he doesn't appreciate his underling trying to make physics funny.

Still, he's impressed by how his protege has driven his Jaguar F-Pace SUV to defy gravity.

"We are the masters of time and space," declares the younger villain.

"And we all drive Jaguars," Hawking replies, before adding: "Hah. Hah. Hah."

Revealing his dark side has been Hawking's ambition for some time. Two years ago, he admitted that he'd love to be a Bond villain.

I suppose a Jaguar ad is the next best thing, or perhaps the 15th next best.

The Jaguar brand has undergone some changes since I owned one and had to give it back because it kept rattling.

I can offer you one reason to consider a Jaguar. Wolfgang Epple, director of research and technology for Jaguar, insists the company will never make a driverless car.

You see, once we're all being forcibly driven around by Google technology, there might still be villains on the road.

Yes, Jaguar drivers.

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