'Change you can believe in'. 'A new era of responsibility'. 'I will be a President who will do things that actually make sense'.
These were kinds of phrases lifting my spirits when I came across a new iPod touch application that made me feel I'd just walked into a very large road sign. You see, this new application is called BulletFlight. And it will help you, well, shoot things better.
You know, things like tin cans on a ledge. And partridges in a pear tree. And, well, I don't know, annoying varmints or neighbors, I suppose. Although I am telling you here and now that you shouldn't under any circumstances.
The BulletFlight seems to cost about as much as a few pencils and is downloadable from your friendly iTunes store.
Using BulletFlight requires simple maneuvering. You attach your iPod touch to your, say, sniper rifle, and tap in a few details about the wind, the moon and the stars. And the bullets, the range of the target and your blood pressure. (Well, maybe not the last one).
It doesn't offer its results in a table format. Rather, according to BulletFlight's iTunes page, "it dynamically gives you the solution you need now to take that shot." Which I assume means it tells you exactly where to point your weapon for optimum destructive penetration: something akin to 'click four times to the left and'.
Or, in the manufacturer's own words: "When you provide a range to the target, the app will simply say how many clicks you need to change the scope by for that range and wind speed."
I know all of you keep guns around the house, so perhaps you'll be able to tell me if this sounds like an excellent way to spend $11.99.
Perhaps you'll also be able to tell me whether there is a way to attach my iPod touch to a golf club. I need to make my 5-iron just a little more accurate.