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Google's new Android ad is ridiculously, bestially cute

Technically Incorrect: Animals, lots of animals, strange pairings of animals in order to tell you to "Be together, not the same." How can you not sniffle?

Technically Incorrect offers a slightly twisted take on the tech that's taken over our lives.

Just look at these two happy misfits. Weep, now, weep. And buy an Android phone. Google/YouTube screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

I don't cry very often, but when I do, I cry enough to fill two pitchers of Dos Equis.

The things that make me cry, you see, aren't those that are supposed to make me cry.

For example, Top Chef finalist Mei Lin is hard as frozen chocolate. But in this week's episode, she was so afraid of losing that the tears slid down her face like kids down a greasy slide. I bawled.

Google, on the other hand, rarely makes me bawl, save in the sense of bellowing with laughter. So its new ad for Android didn't affect my tears ducts at all.

I fear, though, that it will affect yours.

Google has suddenly realized that it must make Androiders a fanperson cabal, just like Apple's. Its strategy is to tell them that though they might have different phones, they are part of one big hoping-to-be cult.

The latest attempt to do this involves emoting you into culthood. And what works better that cute, cuddly animals?

Lots of animals, happy animals, loving animals. And the loveliest thing of all about these animals is that their best friends are animals that you would never expect to be their best friends.

It's adorable, of course, to see an elephant and a sheep play together. When a cat and a dog conspire to trick themselves out of confinement, you'll be charmed.

This will move the masses from the chilly side of the world to the roasting, even if it doesn't immediately (or ever) get them to buy an Android phone.

Google has, though, waited quite a while (or even too long) in order to create that unified identity for its fragmented system.

I fear that if Mei Lin loses in the last episode next week, I might be fragmented for several days.