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Fake Door Drop app makes life easier (and grosser) for lazy millennials

Funny or Die's fictional Door Drop app is aimed at app-addicted millennials who want help getting their deliveries from the porch into their hands and mouths.

Amanda Kooser
Freelance writer Amanda C. Kooser covers gadgets and tech news with a twist for CNET. When not wallowing in weird gear and iPad apps for cats, she can be found tinkering with her 1956 DeSoto.
Amanda Kooser
2 min read
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A Door Drop assistant waits on your porch.

Video screenshot by Amanda Kooser/CNET

You know the feeling. You're excited about an Amazon Prime package showing up. You can't wait to get your hands on it and pop open the box to enjoy the gallon of Tuscan Dairy Whole Vitamin D Milk or Bic for Her pens. But you're sitting on the couch watching Netflix and it's such a hassle to have to go to the door when UPS knocks.

Internet comedy provider Funny or Die has you covered with the fictional Door Drop app. The software, which features the tagline "The app that lets you do nothing," tackles that last-mile problem between your front door and you. When high-tech delivery services bring you products or Uber burritos-on-demand, Door Drop is there to get the package into your hot little hands.

Before you watch the video, please note that it veers into a mildly not-safe-for-work scene at the very end.

The video, published last week, plays out like an earnest Kickstarter message, trying hard to convince you of your need for this app. The pitchman sells it: "Introducing Door Drop. The revolutionary app that brings any delivery from straight outside your house, directly inside your house. So you never have to leave the couch. Now that's convenience."

If it really existed, Door Drop would work like this: You order from any convenient delivery service on your smartphone and open up the Door Drop app to let it know the expected time of arrival. Unlock your door, disable your home security system, tuck your dog away in a crate and kick back.

"We'll send someone under 25 who doesn't understand we're not paying them well to wait on your porch," the pitchman enthusiastically intones. Naturally, there are some service upgrades available. Your personal Door Drop assistant can chew your food for you and perform other disgusting but convenient tasks.

Funny or Die is skewering app-addicted techies who get everything from groceries to toiletries to meals delivered at the touch of a button on a mobile device. Perhaps what's most funny here is that Door Drop is almost absurd enough to be real.