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Elon Musk to aliens: 'Damn you'

Commentary: In a couple of well-timed April 1 tweets, the Tesla and SpaceX CEO chuckles at himself and his grand designs.

Chris Matyszczyk
2 min read

Technically Incorrect offers a slightly twisted take on the tech that's taken over our lives.


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He's like a nerdy Hugh Grant, isn't he?

John Shearer, Getty Images

This is what happens when you recycle a rocket and it comes back to Earth safely.

You start wondering about how small you are. You start dreaming about the great beyond and the far smarter beings out there.

Conveniently for Elon Musk, it's April Fool's Day, so no one will take you seriously.

In a couple of tweets launched on Saturday, the SpaceX and Tesla CEO mused about potential celestial truths.

"Technology breakthrough: turns out chemtrails are actually a message from time-traveling aliens describing the secret of teleportation," he tweeted.

The legend of chemtrails is that they reveal a government or corporate (or both) chemical spraying program of vast proportions. Most scientists believe this isn't the case. Musk's posit offers far more optimism.

Now emboldened to go where no Twitterer has gone before, Musk followed this with: "Why did we waste so much time developing silly rockets? Damn you, aliens! So obtuse! You have all this crazy tech, but can't speak English!?"

Perhaps the problem is that we can't speak alien, or even tweet in it.

Indeed, there's something so sad about humans who expect everyone to speak English, just as the original British colonists did.

Here, though, Musk was having his amusements in the spirit of the day and in the spirit of his quest to discover the great beyond.

How beautiful it would be if an alien tweeted him back with bizarre blobs and hieroglyphics and two English words added: "Just kidding."