11-year-old pilfers $3,000 to finance gaming, report says

A Chinese boy is so in need of enhancing his gaming experience that he allegedly steals cash from beneath the bed of one of his mother's tenants.

A still from the new IGN game "The Last Laugh." It made me laugh. IGN Screenshot: Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

If there's one thing that the last few years have taught us, it's that one can never have enough money.

There are so many things in this world to do and enjoy that an infinity of currency is barely enough to finance human pleasure.

Who, therefore, can be surprised that one 11-year-old in China reportedly decided that he couldn't truly enjoy his online gaming without warm, soft cash?

It's not always easy for 11-year-old boys to get cash. In this case, as Kotaku reports, the boy, who lives in Xianning City, discovered that one of his mother's tenants kept her savings beneath her bed.

The tenant, whose surname was given as Li, went to the police. After all, there was more than 20,000 renminbi (or around $3,141) missing. I know that, literally, "renminbi" means "people's currency." However, I don't think it means that any people can simply have yours.

Still, the more the people's police thought about it, the more they were convinced that the miscreant had to be someone close to Li. At least, in proximity.

It's not as if she kept her front door open, in hopeful invitation that someone might pop in and, well, borrow her cash.

In the end, the shadow of suspicion fell upon the boy, last name Cheng. It reportedly took five hours of insistent questioning by police before he said: "Look, you dummies. Do you realize how much it costs to have a really cool online gaming experience?

I am not sure he used precisely those words. However, this surely must have been the gist of his distraught admission.

Police say that his method -- which has enough guile to show that he may well be a highly advanced gamer -- was to wait for his mother to play cards on the second floor of her building. Then he sneaked the key to the tenant's apartment away and performed the robbery, according to the report.

In an act of sheer bravery, he then stashed the cash beneath a brick in an abandoned building.

Now, of course, there remains the matter of restitution.

Perhaps Cheng could be entered in some online gaming competitions, so that he can win the money back?

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