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The History of the Internet

by grandpaw7 / January 1, 2006 12:06 PM PST

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by
the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young
wife by the name of Dot.

And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and
long of leg. Indeed, she had been called 'Amazon Dot
Com.'

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou
travel far from town to town with thy goods when thou
can trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several
saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said,
"How, dear?" And Dot replied, "I will place drums in
all the towns and drums in between to send messages
saying what you have for sale and they will reply
telling you which hath the best price. And the sale
can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's
Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have
her way with the drums. And the drums rang out and
were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods
he had at the top price, without ever moving from his
tent.

But this success did arouse envy. A man named Maccabia
did secrete himself inside Abraham's drum and was
accused of insider trading. And the young man did take
to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take
to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical
Rich Dominican Siderites, or NERDS for short.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new
riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one
noticed that the real riches were going to the drum
maker, one Brother William of Gates, who bought up
every drum company in the land. And indeed did insist
on making drums that would work only with Brother
Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.

And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is
being taken over by others."

And as Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or
as it came to be known "eBay" he said, "We need a name
that reflects what we are."

And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner
Operators."

"YAHOO," said Abraham.

And that is how it all began. It wasn't Al Gore after all!

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