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smiles from the bible

by Mark5019 / September 17, 2006 9:41 AM PDT

Smiles from the Bible...

Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth?
A. Ruthless.

Q. What do they call pastors in Germany ?
A. German Shepherds.

Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.

Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. David's Triumph was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.

Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A. Samson. He brought the house down.

Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden ?
A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.

Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.

Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A. The area around Jordan . The banks were always overflowing.

Q. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?
A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.

Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
A. Joshua, son of Nun.

Q. Why didn't they play cards on the Ark ?
A. Because Noah was standing on the deck. (Groan...)

Did you know it's a sin for a woman to make coffee?

Yup, it's in the Bible. It says . . . "He-brews"

One more:

Who was the unhappiest when the Prodigal son returned?

A: The fatted calf !

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(NT) (NT) And it's not even BJW ....
by Dragon / September 17, 2006 10:36 AM PDT
In reply to: smiles from the bible
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(NT) (NT) got to be a step ahead
by Mark5019 / September 17, 2006 10:38 AM PDT
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And at least you can post this kind of stuff
by Steven Haninger / September 17, 2006 10:52 AM PDT

and still rest in peace tonight....er...uh...maybe "Rest in Peace" wasn't the best choice of words. Happy

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(NT) (NT) :) i allways can rest in peace
by Mark5019 / September 17, 2006 10:53 AM PDT
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by drpruner / September 18, 2006 9:34 AM PDT
In reply to: smiles from the bible

Who was the shortest man in the Bible?
Bildad the Shuhite. (Book of Job)

Who was the smallest ...
Nehemiah, who "stood upon his watch."

And Joshua, of course, was the son of a Catholic.

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