Please, HELP - Vista - Update Issues - SP1

Please, HELP - Vista Home Premium - Update Issues

I can't update SP1, (or any other updates)...

I have downloaded and tried to apply the "Update Readiness" tool...

Though, this requires that "windows update service" be enabled.

BUT, when I enable the update service:

I get a command prompt box and an error box that pops up every 10 seconds or so. The error says:

"C:\Windows\system32\wuauclt.exe The NTVDM CPU has encountered an illegal instruction." Once I close it, it pops up again shortly there after.

And the "Update Readiness" tool reports:

"Some updates were not installed
Hotfix for Windows KB947821"

I've searched and searched, but I cannot find a solution... I would be so grateful for any help, regarding this issue...

Cheers ~Niki

PS, I'm here ready to post a HJT log, and or other system info. I've ran programs to find malware, viruses, rootkits, etc... (SBD, and Malawarebytes, Panda online, etc... But everything comes back as clean...=( Below, I've included my system info and some of the error messages from the event logs....

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
HP a6313w / 2GB memory / 32 bit
Windows Vista Home Premium, (bah!)
NVIDIA GeForce 6150SE nForce 430
AMD Athlon 64 X2 Dual Core Processor 5000+ 2.60 GHz
2GB memory
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Application popup: 16 bit MS-DOS Subsystem : C:\Windows\system32\wuauclt.exe
The NTVDM CPU has encountered an illegal instruction.
CS:0002 IP:0055 OP:f0 00 f0 37 05 Choose 'Close' to terminate the application.

DCOM got error "1084" attempting to start the service wuauserv with arguments "" in order to run the server:
{E60687F7-01A1-40AA-86AC-DB1CBF673334}

The COM+ Event System detected a bad return code during its internal processing. HRESULT was 8007043c from line 45 of d:\vistartm\com\complus\src\events\tier1\eventsystemobj.cpp. Please contact Microsoft Product Support Services to report this error.

Windows Servicing failed to complete the process of setting package KB936330 (Service Pack) into Absent(Absent) state

Windows Servicing identified that package KB936330(Service Pack) is not applicable for this system

The Windows update "Hotfix for Windows (KB947821)" could not be installed because of an error: 3221225477 "" (Command line: ""C:\Windows\system32\wusa.exe" "C:\Downloads\Software\Windows6.0-KB947821-v7-x86.msu" ")

The Windows update "Hotfix for Windows (KB947821)" could not be installed because of an error: 2149875732 "" (Command line: ""C:\Windows\system32\wusa.exe" "C:\Downloads\Software\Windows6.0-KB947821-v7-x86.msu" ")

The Windows update "Update for Windows (KB948610)" was successfully installed. (Command line: ""C:\Windows\system32\WUSA.exe" "C:\Users\Nichole\AppData\Local\Temp\dotnetfx3530729.01\1033\dotnetmsp\x86\NetFX3.0-KB948610-v6001-x86.msu" /quiet /norestart")