.....but you have me there for company!
I had a great giggle from this. Had read something similar before, but not this one. This line got me the best:
"Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball. Right now I can only be third base."
It's obvious humor, and meant as a satire on the crazy e-scams.
You do find some good'uns
I'm not sure why I laughed, am I cruel?
My name is Billy Evans, and I'm a nine-year-old boy. My mother is typing
this for me, because I can't. She is crying. The reason she is so sad is
because I'm so sick. I was born without a body. It doesn't hurt, except
when I try to breathe.
The doctors gave me an artificial body. It is a burlap bag filled with
leaves. The doctors said that was the best they could do on account of
us having no money or insurance. I would like to have a body transplant,
but we need more money. Mommy doesn't work because she said nobody hires
I said, "Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged my burlap bag. Mommy always
gives me hugs, even though she's allergic to burlap and it makes her
sneeze and chafes her real bad. I hope you will help me. You can help me
if you forward this email to everyone you know. Forward it to people you
don't know, too.
Dr. Johansen said that for every person you forward this email to, Bill
Gates will team up with AOL and send a nickel to NASA. With that
funding, NASA will collect prayers from school children all over America
and have the astronauts take them up into space so that the angels can
hear them better.
Then they will come back to earth and go to the Pope, and he will take
up a collection in church and send all the money to the doctors. The
doctors could help me get better then.
Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball. Right now I can only be
Every time you forward this letter, the astronauts can take more prayers
to the angels and my dream will be closer to coming true. Please help
me. Mommy is so sad, and I want a body. I don't want my leaves to rot before I
If you don't forward this email, that's okay. Mommy says you're a mean
and heartless ******* who doesn't care about a poor little boy with only
a head. She says that if you don't stew in the raw pit of your own
guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes you die a long slow horrible death and
then burn forever in hell. What kind of cruel person are you that you
can't take five freakin' minutes to forward this to all your friends so
that they can feel guilt and shame about ignoring a poor, bodiless
Please help me. I try to be happy, but it's hard. I wish I had a kitty.
I wish I could hold a kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty that wouldn't
chew on me and try to bury its turds in the leaves of my burlap body. I
wish that very much. Thank You, Billy "Smiley" Evans