Thank you for being a valued part of the CNET community. As of December 1, 2020, the forums are in read-only format. In early 2021, CNET Forums will no longer be available. We are grateful for the participation and advice you have provided to one another over the years.

Thanks,

CNET Support

General discussion

Not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, & Texan jokes... You know you're in California! when......

Nov 26, 2003 12:09AM PST

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.

3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation
in English.

4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is
named Breeze.

5. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown,
and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

8. You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.

9. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

10. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

11. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.

12. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

13. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps. You
don't even notice.

14. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30am at Starbucks wearing the baseball
cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney really IS George Clooney.

15. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

16. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who
delivers your mail is into S & M, and your Mary Kay rep is a guy in drag.

17. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

18. Its barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station:
"STORM WATCH 2003."

19. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Blanks
himself is teaching the 4:00pm Tae Bo class.

20. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy
with their cells or pagers.

21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour
early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

22. Hey!!!! Is Pot Illegal????

23. Both you AND your dog have therapists.

24. The Terminator is your governor.

Discussion is locked

- Collapse -
LOL...Used to visit relative in CA. Know 1st hand 21of those are valid. (NT)
Nov 26, 2003 12:27AM PST

.

- Collapse -
Defending California :) part 1(darn bug)
Nov 26, 2003 4:05AM PST
1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

False: She has two. How do I know this? It?s a secret.

2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.

False: I don?t make a fraction of that amount, but I still own a home. However, I?m tired of eating Top Ramen 3 times a day, 7 days a week.

3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.

Damn tourists! Go home!

4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.

False: She has blue hair, a tongue ring, and her name is Sky.

5. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

Is it really illegal?

6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

No I haven?t, but I have been to a baby shower with two dads and a sperm donor? Wink

7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

False: Do they really grow coffee beans in Ethiopia? Just fascinating!

8. You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.

False: Arugula, what's that? However I know which Japanese restaurant serves the freshest Sashmi though.

9. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

Get out of here! Is it really illegal?!
- Collapse -
Defending California :) part 2 (damn bug)
Nov 26, 2003 4:09AM PST
10. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

False: There are no such thing as great parking spaces!

11. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.

False: Not the one I was in.

12. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

False: $1.70/gallon for regular unleaded at the moment.

13. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps. You don't even notice.

False: When I see that, I think of the Blue Oyster bar from the movie Police Academy.

14. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30am at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney really IS George Clooney.

False: It was Tom Cruise.

15. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

False: My car cost as much as my home

16. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who
delivers your mail is into S & M, and your Mary Kay rep is a guy in drag.


False: My hairdresser is gay. My plumber is a woman. My wife?s Mary Kay rep is my Mom. The woman who delivers my mail is not into S & M? how do I know this? It?s a secret.
- Collapse -
Defending California :) part 3 ( #@!%@# bug!)
Nov 26, 2003 4:10AM PST
17. You can't remember...is pot illegal?

It?s illegal??? Since when?

18. Its barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH 2003."

False: Don?t you know that it doesn?t rain in California?

19. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00pm Tae Bo class.

False: I have to leave work early for Martha Stewart's seminar on how to make a lot money the illegal way without getting busted.

20. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cells or pagers.

False: They only use Blue Tooth equipped PDAs

21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

False: Two hours early.

22. Hey!!!! Is Pot Illegal????

Pot is plant, not a drug!

23. Both you AND your dog have therapists.

False: You forgot about my parrot and cat?s therapists.

24. The Terminator is your governor.

This is the only sad truth about California.
- Collapse -
NT #24...you may be right, but time will tell...
Nov 26, 2003 4:25AM PST

.

- Collapse -
NT Lee, outstanding answers...LOL
Nov 26, 2003 8:30AM PST

.

- Collapse -
nt) Hi, Jack. Haven't seen you here much lately. How's things? Ian
Nov 26, 2003 8:47AM PST

.

- Collapse -
NT #16...you have a mail man! how do i know? it's a secret :-)
Nov 26, 2003 4:24AM PST

.

- Collapse -
NT #6...gross :)
Nov 26, 2003 4:22AM PST

.

- Collapse -
better California than here.
Nov 26, 2003 4:26AM PST

the Terminator of course. Congrats California.

- Collapse -
Re:better California than here.
Nov 26, 2003 4:44AM PST

Oh yeah? Well OUR governor can beat up YOUR governor.

- Collapse -
Re:better California than here.
Nov 26, 2003 4:47AM PST

Sadly, your governor would think that's a solution to something.

Dan

- Collapse -
(NT) Rain on a joke parade?
Nov 26, 2003 1:22PM PST
Wink
- Collapse -
Re:yellow Rain on a joke parade
Nov 26, 2003 2:18PM PST

it's called a pissing contest Sad

*shoot! i may have to start thinking PC if this keeps up*

- Collapse -
well, when it falls into the Pacific, you'll all be sorry. :-)) (NT)
Nov 26, 2003 8:59AM PST

.

- Collapse -
NT - If it wasn't for the last point, it actually sounds pretty good to me!
Nov 26, 2003 2:49PM PST

`?