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General discussion

'lil ole lady, big ole .44.....

by jonah jones May 1, 2006 4:04AM PDT

LITTLE OLD LADY and her Defense Attorney

Defense Attorney:
Will you please state your age?

Little Old Lady:
I am 92 years old.

Defense Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words what happened
the night of April 1st?

Little Old Lady:
There I was, sitting there in my swing, on my
front porch on a warm spring evening, when a
young man comes creeping up on the porch and
sat down beside me.

Defense Attorney:
Did you know him?

Little Old Lady:
No, but he sure was friendly.

Defense Attorney:
What happened after he sat down?

Little Old Lady:
He started to rub my thigh.

Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him?

Little Old Lady:
No, I didn't stop him.

Defense Attorney:
Why not?

Little Old Lady:
It felt good. Nobody had done that since
my Abner died
some 30 years ago.

Defense Attorney:
What happened next?

Little Old Lady:
He began to rub my breasts.

Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him then?

Little Old Lady:
No, I did not stop him.

Defense Attorney:
Why not?

Little Old Lady:
His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited.
I haven't felt that good in years!

Defense Attorney:
What happened next?

Little Old Lady:
Well, by then, I was feeling really "spicy" so
I just laid down and told him "Take me, young
man. Take me!"

Defense Attorney:
Did he take you?

Little Old Lady:
Hell, no! He just yelled, "April Fools!"
And that's when I shot him, the little *******!

,,,