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Colleagues, need native english help.

by ravik936 / April 12, 2006 5:22 PM PDT

How do you do colleagues, is required your help to check the quality an english on my website.
There is suspicion that my translator has done work not very qualitative.

This is the links, text not so much, please help unless it is difficult:

http://pantalone.atspace.com/GUI.htm
http://pantalone.atspace.com/License.htm
http://pantalone.atspace.com/Web_Home.htm
http://pantalone.atspace.com/Web_Download.htm
http://pantalone.atspace.com/Web_Buy.htm
http://pantalone.atspace.com/Web_Support.htm
http://pantalone.atspace.com/Web_ContactUs.htm

Thank you.

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First Take
by Dirty Pirate / April 12, 2006 6:26 PM PDT

I read everything but the license file (because Pirates don't believe in them Wink and it would make for a ugly precedent). Now I only did a quick read through, but the documents did not appear to have any spelling mistakes and the syntax appears proper. So in my opinion, your translator did a good job for you.

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ty
by ravik936 / April 12, 2006 8:10 PM PDT
In reply to: First Take

Thank you.
You american?
Some people tell me that text is bad, look this quote:
I checked GUI:
Are you specifically wanting to Compact databases? I was thinking that Compress sounds better.

Also, the error message ''Sorry, an error has occurred. Try to restart the program.''
Why do you want the user to try restarting the program? Is there any reason to do this besides ''Try running the program again, maybe it was just a temporary bug?'' (Don't use that)?

If there is no reason, I would say ''Sorry, an error has occured. Restarting the program may help to avoid this error.'', but you should have an exact reason why the error occured.

''If the error repeats again, please send a message with attached ErrorReport.txt file located in the program folder, to the following e-mail address:''
should be ''If the error occurs again, ...'', because repeats again is redundant.
and ''... message with the attached ...''
and I assume you have an e-mail address going there.

Remove the comma (,) in
''Click the link, and the default e-mail program will create a message.''

''You have to choose, whether to become a registered user and continue using the program or to refuse to register and stop using the program.''
Has lots of words to convey something simple;

''You must register to continue using the program''

''To register the program click ?Buy Now?, and you will go to the registration page.''
Again, kill the comma. No commas should appear before ''and'' or ''or'', unless you are naming three or more objects.

''Note: you can prolong the trial period by clearing the database. To do it, click the ?Clear database? button.''
Could be one sentence.
Note: you can prolong the trial period by clicking the ''Clear database'' button to clear the database.

(That sounds odd to give advice on how to prolong a trial period though)

''Thank you for showing interest to Smart CD Catalog.''
I would say ''using'' instead of ''showing interest to''
or ''your interest in'' instead of ''showing interest to''

''Cannot open the catalog; the disk is probably full.''
Be decisive: is the disk full, or is it not? I would assume that my program would know if a disk is full.

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The license file
by barret55 / April 12, 2006 11:31 PM PDT
In reply to: First Take

Since I'm not a pirate (ha ha), I went and read through your EULA. The only correction I could find was in section 1 "Grant of License."

In the second paragraph, the second sentence that starts with "With Personal License...," i would add the letter 'a' so it would read:

"With a Personal License ..."

Other than that, it looked good.


-Terry

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Terry
by ravik936 / April 13, 2006 12:08 AM PDT
In reply to: The license file

Thank you!

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