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ask grandma

by Mark5019 / February 2, 2006 4:37 AM PST

Lawyers should never ask a Southern grandma a question if they aren't
prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first
witness, a grandmotherly,
elderly woman to the stand.

He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since
you were a young
boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you
cheat on your wife, and
you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think
you're a big shot when
you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more
than a two-bit paper
pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the
room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?

She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy,
bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal
relationship with anyone and his
law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he
cheated on his wife with
three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died. The judge asked both counselors to
approach the bench, and in
a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, I'll
throw your sorry rear in jail
for contempt."

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(NT) (NT) Laughing and can't stop! Someone please help! :-)
by Steven Haninger / February 2, 2006 4:41 AM PST
In reply to: ask grandma
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It isn't that funny.........
by Self-Destruction / February 2, 2006 4:22 PM PST

How are you finding it so funny?

It is an o.k. joke but not something I would need to lie about.

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Everyone has different tastes....
by EdH / February 2, 2006 10:22 PM PST

and what people find funny is subjective.

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ed look at its beging member ship
by Mark5019 / February 2, 2006 10:38 PM PST

not a newbie another MPD

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Hey Self-Destruction.......
by hh / February 2, 2006 10:41 PM PST

I bet you like 24 on Fox?

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(NT) (NT) bingo its back:)
by Mark5019 / February 2, 2006 10:47 PM PST
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Funny Grandnaw
by taboma / February 2, 2006 3:29 PM PST
In reply to: ask grandma

That is really funny.
Tell this to grandpaw. He will like it also.
Mark, do you know who I mean? One of our members here on a regular basis.


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(NT) (NT) sorry brain fart here i dont:(
by Mark5019 / February 2, 2006 10:39 PM PST
In reply to: Funny Grandnaw
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We know who you mean, But
by Glenda / February 4, 2006 1:03 AM PST
In reply to: Funny Grandnaw

Grandpaw doesn't like any of us in SE Sad Go figure! we are a great bunch Devil

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by Mac McMullen / February 2, 2006 4:43 PM PST
In reply to: ask grandma
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(NT) (NT) Describes my momma to a "T"!
by shaner7575 / February 2, 2006 10:04 PM PST
In reply to: ask grandma
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Reminds me of when the Kennedy cousin went on trial
by Diana Forum moderator / February 3, 2006 7:55 AM PST
In reply to: ask grandma

for killing that girl when he was a teenager.

One of the potential jurors said that all the Kennedys had trouble letting their little head control their big head. Wink


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(NT) (NT) must be a clinton kenndy thing:)
by Mark5019 / February 3, 2006 7:59 AM PST
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