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Your first glimpse of Walmart shoppers fighting over phones

There is no greater post-Thanksgiving tradition than witnessing what the craving for gadgets has done to humanity. Here's some of the first footage of the Zombie Apocalypse, Walmart-style.

The joy of Thanksgiving.
Slim Boogie/YouTube screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

You might have decided to have a few extra hours in bed this morning. The English call that a lie-in.

Or you might have laid out overnight in the hope of buying a cheap gadget or two that will change the quality of your life.

But nothing describes more clearly the strength of the human condition than a little footage of predatory mall action.

I therefore got up especially early to try and scour the Web and trace a little video from, say, a Walmart.

So here, in all its splendor, is the sight of hundreds of people purportedly fighting over phones.

I cannot confirm which Walmart enjoyed this Zombie apocalypse.

However, as you watch the video, there is something very reassuring about the sound of police sirens in the background and victorious faces in the foreground, as people clutch their score like it's already Xmas.

There is something calming about the men in black "police" T-shirts, helping those who might have failed -- or those who might merely have failed to take due diligence and who risked being crushed.

Everyone is there: the young and the supposedly mature.

Because if you can't get a bargain on a gadget in the next few hours, what are you?

Inadequate, that's what.