Microsoft stresses 'beauty' in new IE9 ad. Sure beats vomit

It may be a stretch for Microsoft to mention 'beauty' and its software in the same breath. But these are radical times. And for IE8, after all, the company did offer us... puke.

Screenshot: Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

I confess to have become browser-bored. I have a feeling that Chrome might be the best, but I don't use it because it seems like Google is trying to trap me in a vortex of Googlephilia. Don't they have enough pieces of me already?

I use Firefox (I know, I know), because, oh, they seem like nice people. They're even nice when it crashes, which is more than I'd like it to.

Then there's Internet Explorer. It seems to have been around since PCs were worth using, without ever seeming terribly interesting.

So the advent of IE9, to an average pitiful human being like me, seems like so much of very little.

Yet here is an IE9 ad, disinterred by the Next Web, that attempts to present the new Microsoft browser as, well, beautiful.


Some might imagine that "Microsoft" and "beautiful" trip from the lips about as readily as cod and custard.

However, this ad at least attempts to inject a little uplift into the Internet Explorer franchise. You might, in consultation with your medical counselors, have forgotten how Microsoft advertised IE 8. Well, it offered vomit.

This did have something of an impact, though it was one that caused Microsoft to yank the regurgitating wife back behind the curtains of her boudoir.

Browser-pushers seem these days to realize that they must find way to appeal to emotions. Google, in particular, has made very fine attempts to mask its need to mine every element of your life, with ads that mine Apple's traditional emotional territory.

This IE9 ad does include quotes from certain publications that offer deeply nuanced praise. "Amazingly fast," apparently said the New York Times. "Simply stunning," said Conceivably Tech.

CNET's Stephen Shankland offered something a little more detailed, but largely complementary, when he spent 3 weeks with IE9.

So, though this ad is certainly not revolutionary, perhaps it might awaken those who have yet committed their browser life to Google, Firefox, Opera or one of the other fine, forgotten names.

The beast presents beauty. They write musicals about that sort of thing.