Technically Incorrect offers a slightly twisted take on the tech that's taken over our lives.
Heinz is currently adorning US TV screens with ad for something it calls mustard.
I wonder whether "mustard" might be code for, well, something else.
This troubling thought assaults my mind on hearing that a German man, Daniel Korell, bought a bottle of Heinz legendary tomato ketchup and got something of a big surprise.
As the Guardian reports, the ketchup bottle had a QR code. Some people get very excited about those. This QR code led you to details of a promotion through which you could get a personalized ketchup bottle.
I'd better clarify that last sentence. Korell's QR code led him to details that should never be featured on ketchup bottles. Suddenly he was confronted by images that wouldn't pass mustard in many a household.
Heinz neglected to renew the domain for the promotion, sagsmithheinz.de. It was picked up by a German porn company. I cannot confirm that what the ketchup customer found at this address was a very large man called Heinz performing oddly saucy feats.
Heinz (the ketchup manufacturer) slid onto Facebook to offer its sorrow. It explained that this bottle was a remnant. It claimed the porn site's existence was beyond its control.
There were, however, certain kinks in this story that make me sit somewhat awkwardly. First of all, Heinz -- in Facebook's translation (provided by Bing) -- said to Korell: "As an excuse we would offer you love."
Oh, Heinz. Ohhh, Heinz.
The love included tools to make his own personalized label.
There is, though, a further symbolism to this tale that I can't fail to mention. The bottle was actually Heinz Tomato Ketchup Hot.
Yes, it was.