I normally leave "Top Chef" recordings for a Friday night. Somehow it helps the soul and the indigestion.
This fine piece of television gives competent, but not yet infamous, chefs the chance to gain some fame by having the flames of their talent fanned by celebrated chefs and the power of television.
This season, which opened Thursday, features a contestant from Google. No, not a programmer or a digitally dextrous designer.
May I introduce you to Preeti Mistry, the 33-year-old executive chef with Google's Bon Appetit management company.
Mistry is Cordon Bleu trained. Unfortunately, her appearance on the first episode left her with a cordon rouge adorning her cheeks.
On BravoTV's site, Mistry, when asked what kind of food she would be in a different life: "I would be a green zebra tomato - extremely distinctive from all the others, a little hard on the outside, but pure love at the center."
Well, on her very first quick-fire challenge, she found it somewhat difficult to deal with a food that was also a little hard on the outside.
Asked to shuck 15 clams, she told herself, with deeply engrained Googlie confidence, that clams should be dealt with just the same as oysters. She told herself that because she had never shucked a clam.
Well, it appears that clams and oysters are as similar as trees and bananas, as Mistry struggled with her clammy technique and created a disorder that might have made Marisa Mayer, for example, feel a little discomfort in her esophagus.
Peter Kafka at AllThingsD reports that those back at the Google ranch declare that she is "recovering" from her "Top Chef" experience.
The show was taped earlier this year and contestants have a large, sharp knife held over their top hats that prevents them from revealing the outcome.
However, Mistry does have a Twitter page, on which she's gamely made a couple of jokes that are, naturally, clam dunks. (e.g. "Top Chef tomorrow night. My hands are getting clammy!)
Clearly, Google's brand reputation is at stake here. And I fear that the gorging public may end up being as dismayed as the first time they saw Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak totally founder on the dance floor in ABC's "Dancing with the Stars".
Could it be that, like Woz, we will hear Mistry in the coming weeks suffering injury and calling the producers "liars"?
I can't eat for worrying about next week's episode set for 10 p.m. Wednesday on Bravo.