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Google's brilliant response to Colbert's inferiority complex

Satirist Stephen Colbert complains that a Google search has his height wrong. So, try searching "How tall is Stephen Colbert" now.

Google decides to offer a humorous perspective on the height of Stephen Colbert. Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

Stephen Colbert is shrinking with rage.

As he explained a couple of days ago on his show, he regularly Googles himself and simply cannot take the fact that he is listed as 5 feet 10 inches when he is, in (his own) fact, an inch taller.

He demanded that Larry Page offer "a retraction, an investigation, an apology and a substantial cash settlement."

If he didn't get one, he promised fisticuffs: "Fix it, or I will fix you, Page. And yes, that is a physical threat."

You might imagine that the mild-mannered Page would accede to a star's demands. You might have thought he would fear being mocked from now till the Robot Uprising.

Instead, Google has offered a lovely riposte. If you search "How tall is Stephen Colbert," you get the answer "5 feet 10.5 ins (1.79m-ish)."

You also get a height comparison between Colbert and the far taller Larry Page (5 feet 11 ins) and Conan O'Brien (6 feet 4 ins). There is also a passing reference to tiny news anchor Jon Stewart.

I fear this is the beginning of a very icy war. I fear Colbert will bear down on Page and his cohorts. I fear Google buses being attacked and Sergey Brin's height being brought into public question.

Who will end up being cut down to size?