Being at the party is more important than what you wear.
Even if the check-shirted, bottom-faced killfuns at Google insist you have to wear something.
This is the only conclusion I can reach after hearing that "T**s And Glass" -- no, I haven't asterisked out an "a" and a "t" -- is returning to Google Glass.
Those of healthily lascivious bent might recall that Google banned this app a few weeks ago. Its nature revealed too much of nature.
However, MiKandi, the enterprising Mama Teresas behind this conception, decided to bend over backwards to accommodate Google's hissing insistence on strictness.
In a blog post full of passion, MiKandi, "the world's first and largest adult app store," has sweetened the deal by blocking access to any nudity.
Kids, in America, nudity is bad. Violence, corruption, surveillance, a clothed Jackson, not so much.
MiKandi promises that the Glass-safe version of the app will still be, well, something: "You will now be able to "share and access sexy POV content on our website. To get the party started, we've preloaded the app with Glass-safe images."
Please, do not fear. Glass-safe is still vastly exciting.
"We partnered with top photographers around the globe to pre-load the app with irresistibly hot, *non-pornographic* photos of some of the world's most beautiful models. You can access, vote, and comment on these photos through Glass. Yay!" says the breathless post.
Yay, indeed.
I feel confident that the world of Google Glass will soon become that of Sunset Boulevard on most evenings.
Turn towards any SUV and you will see it full of boys enjoying their visual (and carnal) entertainment on their seat-back DVD players.
In the bear future, people will walk down streets wearing Glass and vast, inappropriate smiles on their faces for seemingly no reason whatsoever.
MiKandi tends to believe this too.
For the blog post whispers: "We're optimistic that once Glass is available to consumers, Google will open the device to allow third-party Glassware that are not subject to the same adult content restrictions. If and when that day comes, we will happily update our app so adult Glass users can get the sexy content they want."
I can just imagine all the thoughtful, sensitive souls who will turn to their lovers and say: "Darling, I shopped for new Glassware today."