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Cat tries to smuggle cell phone into prison

Brazilian police have detained a cat that entered a prison compound with a cell phone, accessories, and a saw strapped to its body.

A little conspicuous.
Clark Griswald/YouTube Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

I've always found cats to be remarkably selfish beings.

They lick you when they want something. When they get it, they're off, without so much as a goodbye nuzzle.

Yet I would like to bring you the story of perhaps the most altruistic cat in the world.

This cat was prepared to risk all four limbs and nine lives in order to get someone out of jail. The question now is: who?

For prison guards in Arapiraca, Brazil, were immediately suspicious when they saw the cat sauntering along, minding its own business and crossing the prison gate.

Kitty had cargo.

A tape was wrapped around its body. It secured a cell phone, earphone, memory card, batteries, and a phone charger. Oh, there was a saw and a drill, too.

You might imagine that this can only have been a LOLcat. But, no.

Reuters reports that police detained the feline and are now trying to decide which of the 263 prisoners represented the destination for this brilliantly innocent scheme.

Offering perhaps one of the most deadpanned comments of this century or any other, a police spokesman told the local Estado de S. Paulo newspaper: "It's tough to find out who's responsible for the action as the cat doesn't speak."

He added that it's usually human beings who try to smuggle things into jails.

The miscreants in this case didn't create the best circumstances for success. The cat was white, so the tape was somewhat conspicuous.

It's not known how the police intend to get to the bottom of all this. Perhaps the prisoner in question had deliberately smeared his fingers with fish, in order to attract the cat's attention.

One imagines, though, that they might begin to trace the source of the cell phone, just in case it throws up a human lead.