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BlackBerry is the phone people want least, survey says

A strange or innovative (depending on your perspective) survey by Raymond James asks consumers which phone they would never, ever buy. BlackBerry is a resounding winner.

Which one would you prefer?
Josh Miller/CNET

Me, I'd never buy Birkenstocks.

"I am a prehistoric intellectual" is just not a message I want to send.

Everyone has their peculiar aversions to certain brands, people, and practices. So, in an interesting psychological twist, Raymond James' research arm decided to ask people which cell phones were, to them, the least attractive.

Yes, which cell phones would you rather shave your head bald, pierce both eyebrows and one bottom cheek, and walk through a freezing garden naked than buy?

I am grateful to AllThingsD for not having an aversion to this survey, one which offered severe conclusions: 71.4 percent of people said they would not never, not ever buy a BlackBerry. A relatively mere 31.3 percent of them said they would never buy an Android phone. And just 19.7 percent said they'd never buy an iPhone.

Just those three numbers will immediately spark spittle and smugness in various parts.

However, I feel bound to place a damp cloth of sanity upon foreheads before too much flak takes flight.

This survey was only conducted among 250 people, so one can but hope that the respondee selection process was pristine.

Let's suppose that it somehow reflects a vague impression, one mere brushstroke.

A gentle conclusion that some might reach is that iPhones deter the least because they're the most physically attractive. Looks do take you a long way in this life.

Another might be that lumping Android phones in as one type is as fair as lumping men, chickens, or Kardashians as all the same.

The Android name covers saints, sinners, and purgatory dwellers, a vast array of life's rich and inexpensive tapestry.

The BlackBerry result, though, might reflect one sole thing. It's not that it's so disliked. It's that the brand has been largely forgotten.

Its image lags behind the reality of making phones that are very much different from the ones with physical keyboards so heartily endorsed by Google's Eric Schmidt.

I would venture that, despite rumors that the Z10 had endured many returns, the competition has swamped BlackBerry for attention.

Look out at the horizon for startling BlackBerry marketing and you'll be looking until the North Korean dinghies invade.

Without apps and a happening spirit, BlackBerry has a very tough climb back to even being considered.

Still, we all adore a comeback, don't we? I'm rooting for BlackBerry, Jim Carrey, Lindsay Lohan, and the San Diego Chargers. The Oakland Raiders can stay where they are.